Is this the terrible twos?

Firstly, are terrible twos a real thing or is this the age that they start to assert their independence more frequently and more vocally?! 

P has always been one for the dramatics, I don’t know where she gets it from…. haha but lately I don’t know if our little miss is just experiencing high frustrations as she is in between being able to use words to communicate to us but some times the barrier of her learning these words and us learning to understand gets in the way or if this is just a power struggle.

My approach to parenting is gentle and responsive and it can be SO hard to be gentle and responsive when you both are tired and meltdowns are happening every few minutes.

Most of her tantrums come from either of the following:

• A toy/task is too challenging
• Said toy isn’t doing what she wants
• Frustration from not understanding what she is saying
• DAD (like mother, like daughter haha)

So to put this post into context: Friday’s are a non daycare day for P. We usually spend the morning having a play then head out until her nap time so that she can have a decent sleep before swimming at 3pm. Now it’s always hit and miss. Some days whatever we do in the morning really tires her out and she naps, some days she just decides to completely skip her nap altogether.

This was one of those skipping naps day (YIKES!). At first I carried on with our usual routine: lunch, wind down then milk in bed ready for sleep. ONE HOUR went by and there was still no sign of sleepy eyes – just pure cheeky smiles, laughter and play (Gahhhh!). So after an hour, I was like right, she’s clearly not napping so let’s go to the play room.

And this is where ground hog day began.

I would say every 30 minutes a meltdown occurred. The best one came from the fact that she was looking at my wedding rings and I said “Daddy married mummy” and she dramatically threw herself back, crying “noooooo! Daddy marry me!”

I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry with her. It was meltdown 67 and I was done. I texted Kody and was like “when are you home!” lol I needed to tap the F out for the day.

Not long after she settled and we snuggled up on the couch, both doing the odd sobbing hiccup noise you do when you cry so much and settled in for the afternoon to watch a movie until Kody got home.

After what seemed like the LONGEST afternoon ever, I stopped and reflected on the events. What I learnt from this day is, no matter how much I wanted to console her and stop her crying and melting down, I should just embrace her meltdown, let her have her moment and console her when she is ready (which Kody tells me to do all the time but I won’t let him take the credit for this idea, right). She didn’t need me to comfort her, she needed me to just let her feel her emotions, however frequent and big they were, and just let her be in that moment. I mean, imagine if someone did that to us instead of letting us vent and cry and just let it out?

So is this the start of terrible twos? Who bloody knows! But what I do know is to the mamas (and dads!) who are in the trenches right now with tantrums and potential terrible twos, threes, fours, teens – we see you, we are here with you and wait until there asleep that night to remember they are just sweet little angels that sometimes make us think WHAT THE F?! haha

As always, remember it’s a phase! (Or so I keep telling myself in order to stay sane! lol)

PLEASE NOTE: I took this photo to show my husband the afternoon we were having – skipped nap meant multiple meltdowns and this was one of many.

Much love,

Tash xx